Unorthodox uses of Aluminum

I use an internet service that, back in the day of paper, was called a newspaper clipping service. It emails me every day a list of articles containing words that are important to me, my business and my blogs.

So, for instance, all of my customers who are publicly traded, and even the bigger ones that are not, I list with this service. I find things out that otherwise it might be months until I learned if this little eagle eyed robot wasn’t keeping an eye peeled for me.

I also have it scan for words of import to metal stamping in general, like copper, steel and aluminum. This occasionally has some amusing side effects – I learn about every (English language) production of Steel Magnolias in existance, and every theft of copper wire (now that copper has become so expensive).

The troller picked up these articles this morning about Aluminum. They only peripherally involve Aluminum, but of course the troller is a very simple beast – it’s not analyzing the content, only running a text search. I have no doubt that in 5 years AI will read the stories and figure out if Aluminum is a major factor in the story, and then I’ll stop getting these.

In the mean time, what a comment on our society!

Troubled congressman keeps his cool / FBI says Louisiana lawmaker on film with $100,000 bribe:
It takes a particular kind of nerve to be filmed taking $100,000 in alleged bribe money out of an FBI informant’s car, have the FBI later find the very same money wrapped in aluminum foil in your freezer — and then adamantly claim that you have done nothing wrong.

I’d say it does.

Other people had amusing things to say about the scandal.

In an article in the Baltimore Sun with the byline Democrats have criticized GOP ethics, but now face fallout from Jefferson case

“Why the freezer? Why not the mattress?” asked Lara Brown, a political scientist

Jefferson’s troubles are “a throwback to the kind of corruption one would have expected in the ’40s and ’50s,” said Larry Sabato, a University of Virginia political scientist

But another historian said

“I don’t remember anything along the lines of money in the freezer,” said Don Ritchie, a Senate historian. “We’ve been calling them ‘frozen assets’ around here.”

On a more serious note, another big use for Aluminum in recent years has been to bludgeon your neighbour with an Aluminum baseball bat. This is only one of about 5 stories like this I’ve heard.

Hate Crime Trial Begins for Man Accused of Baseball Bat Bludgeoning
from the New York Sun

The defendant, Nicholas Minucci, 19, is charged with assaulting Glenn Moore, 23, with a 34-inch aluminum Louisville Slugger in the early morning hours of June 29. [the trial opened with …] prosecutors describing the attack as unprovoked racial violence and the defense depicting it as community policing.

Community policing. What an interesting turn of phrase.

If you’re interested in the man behind the Aluminum, google him

For an insight into why Aluminum prices are so high, check out the astonishing number of assaults with Aluminum baseball bats. According to Google, about 102,000 articles.

You know, every time they take a bat into evidence lockup, it reduces the amount of free Aluminum left in the world for metal stamping …

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